just my ducking luck

what do you call a duck that refuses to be called a duck?

I here refer to that popular line, if it sounds/walks/looks like a duck to end.

Real ducks don’t talk back (at least not in a language we humans can comprehend) so it really doesn’t matter what they think.

But what if said duck finds the term ‘duck’ offensive, and reacts violently to its use?

Placating terms like ‘waterborne fowl’ or ‘creature rendered yellow in popular culture’ are too weak and take too much time to get to the point.

I suppose silence is an option. We could all pretend nothing’s quacking